You Unimaginable Bastard

The reverse Midas, that's me.
The fulcrum of my life, the center of the wheel of my fate, my ka.
I'm clearly a force of destruction in my life and the lives of others.
I attempt to be so meek and inoffensive -- and that is the human time bomb.
You can't go through your life without stepping on someone's toes.
But what do you do when you've dragged a bunch of people into your wake -
into the slipstream of your idiocy?
I hate stepping on toes, I hate confrontation.
I hate arguing.
I don't know exactly how or why or when everything fell out of my grasp.
It's my nature, this horrible confusion, I spread it like a Typhoid Mary.
Patient X.
A black hole - escape velocity past the speed of light, everybody's trapped.
And I create it all out of thin air.
Discomfort, weirdness, bullshit.
It's an accident, I swear.
I don't mean to be so wishy washy - but Man Jesus, does it fuck a lot of people up when I am.
I'm too much of a changeling - nobody knows what or who they're gonna get from me.
Even I wouldn't recognize myself from last week.
Too many masks. Too many Joshs.
A Josh For Work, A Josh For Family, A Josh For This Circle Of Friends, A Josh For That Circle Of Friends,
A Josh By Himself But Pretending People Are Watching Anyway, A Josh On The Couch (even I need a break from all this), A Josh For Summer, Fall, Winter, Rainy Days, Clubs, Bookstores, Getting The Mail, Doing Yoga...
All part of the Josh Milquetoast Inaction Figure Toy Line.