Friday, February 18, 2005

It's Not, What You Thought...When You First Began It...

Happy Birthday to me.Today I'm 26. I assume I'm 26, I've never asked Mom exactly what time I was born and I've never heard her tell that part of the story. I do know that my umbilical cord was wrapped around my neck and that I was blue - some think this is why people become left handed - a lack of blood flow at a crucial moment during birth - I don't know if that's true. 26. So much closer to those numbers that I think of as "adult" numbers - numbers where there's little room for error (the kind of error that I always have at my fingertips). I know my Dad always tells stories about how he never really ever expected to live as long as he has - he always says he assumed he'd be dead early, by some misadventure. This isn't some morose trait of my Dad's - he just has a lot of great stories where he was somewhere he shouldn't have been, doing something he shouldn't have been doing, with people he shouldn't have been hanging around. I'm my father's son, I suppose - I always saw myself in that "Fucked Up And Dead At 27" Club. Selfish, stupid, immature, involved, I know - but truthful. So, it seems...wierd (that's the only word I can think of...but even it doesn't have the right...taste) to be starting this journey to the lands where only decades are celebrated as landmarks...30...40...50...60...can any of you imagine a 60 year old Josh? What sort of twisted, diabolical creature would he be? And what would he think about his younger counterpart? I blame and accuse the Josh Of Ten Minutes Ago as though he were a bastard and a thief...but me from a year ago...two, three...different animal...genetic markers might be the same but I doubt I'd have much to say to 18 or 10 year old Josh. Onion skin.

Let's shake off where that mood wants to take me, shall we. Let's make the choice to be brighter today, not so...prone...to all that shit.

Let's go for a cheap, diverting laugh: my Milky White costume smells like a jizz rag. Gives new meaning to the character's name, yes?

Last night's preview went okay. I had some trouble (of the running into walls variety) but mostly my show, my track went well -- as to the rest of the show, it's hard to say from my vantage. I do know that it was cool to hear Jeff's laugh out in the audinece last night. Very cool of both him and Rob to come last night.

3 comments:

Average Hero said...

Happy Birthday Josh
Go Team venture!!!

David Almeida said...

Josh has been making the jizz rag reference since earlier in the week and I thought he was just exaggerating for comic effect. Last night, as we stood in the wings watching "Agony" I was hovering over Josh and the air shifted in just the right way to waft the aroma into my nostrils. "You're right, your costume is pretty funky there, Dude," was all I could muster. Happiest of Birthdays to Josh with the Mostest of Love from me!

Melina said...

Happy late birthday...and I always thought I'd be dead at 27 too, let's keep our fingers crossed that doesn't happen, I've got a month until I'm 28.