My Favorite Coasters Song

I plopped down in my easy chair
and turned on Channel Two,
a fat gunslinger named Salty Sam
was a-chasing poor Sweet Sue.

He trapped her in The Old Saw Mill
and said with an evil laugh,
"If you don't give me the deed to your ranch,
I'm gonna saw you all in half."

And then he grabbed her! (And then?)
He tied her up! (And then?)
He turned on the buzzsaw!!!
(And then? And then?)
Uh-huh...

And then along came Jones
Tall, thin Jones.
Slow walking Jones.
Slow talking Jones.
Along came lonely, lanky Jones.

Commercial came on, so I got up, to fix myself a snack,
you shoulda seen what was going on by the time that I got back...

Down in The Old Abandoned Mine,
Sweet Sue was a-having fits,
that villain said,
"Give me the deed to your ranch,
or I'll blow you all to bits."

And then he grabbed her! (And then?)
He tied her up! (And then?)
He lit the fuse to the dynamite!
(And then? And then?)
Uh-huh...

And then along came Jones,
Tall. thin Jones.
Slow walking Jones, slow talking Jones.
Along came lonely, lanky Jones.

I got so bugged I turned it off
and turned on another show.
But there was the same old Shoot Em Up
and the same old Rodeo.

Salty Sam was a-trying to stuff Sweet Sue in a burlap sack.
That villian said,
"Give me the deed to your ranch or I'll throw you on The Railroad Track."

And then he grabbed her! (And then?)
He tied her up! (And then)
He threw her on The Railroad Track! (And then?)
A TRAIN STARTED COMING!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(AND THEN? AND THEN!?!?!)


Uh-huh.

And then along came Jones.
Tall, thin Jones.
Slow waling Jones, slow talking Jones.
Along came lonely, lanky Jones.

Along came lonely, lanky Jones.