Community Chest

So, for the last week and a half I'm had the same thought every night:

"Which of my old shoes am I going to boil for dinner tonight?"

Thank Christ-Shiva-Allah-Odin-Apollo that I got paid today. I couldn't eat another Ramen noodle. It was like being a poor college student without that whole pesky going-to-college-and-earning-a-degree aspect. I've had feverish, wet dreams about grocery shopping for the past three nights.

But isn't it funny how relative everything is? When I got to the bank with my check in my hot little hand -- there's a sharp, crisp Marine standing at the door. Toys For Tots. I've supported them many a Christmas past. But today my mission was: deposit check, go to Publix, live the rest of my life in selfish bliss. And I can't really give Toys For Tots a proper donation today.

So, the Marine looks at me like -- "Fuck you, hipster scum, I hope the war goes on forever and you get drafted and die!" Wait, wait, wait....I'm not Mister Pennybags but I swear that I will donate a toy for some tot, some time. Soon. Before Christmas. Maybe even a crippled, black child. I can just see him (or her) smiling right now. It warms the cockles of my heart to give.

I should probably take this moment to thank some of the people that kept me from starving this past week: Bateman, Marcie, Susan, Tyler, and Anna. Thank you. One day, hopefully, I can be there for you guys too.

And Toys For Tots.